I have given a lot of thought to the way I want to grow old. My mom said she was going to live to be 100 so matter of factly the whole time I was growing up, that I just thought that's what one did. So I've always intended to live to be 100. I will be 50 in a few years and it feels like I'll be able to re-start the odometer and do the whole trip over again, so I definitely don't feel old yet, but I assume at some point I will be officially an old woman. Instead of being horrified by that idea, I want to grow in to it graciously. I've known some grand old women, beautiful and gracious and comfortable with their age. They are wise, wonderful, kind and funny. Intelligent and accomplished, too, with very interesting stories to tell. They wear their crowns of white hair as regally as queens and I admire them greatly. That's the kind of old woman I want to be, and I figure it won't just happen. No, I will have to work toward it every day as I build my life decision by decision, choice by choice.
I have always been fascinated by Scarlett of Gone With the Wind fame. She secretly wishes to grow to be exactly like her gracious, self-sacrificing, servant mother. Scarlett is portrayed as self-centered to an amazing degree, willing to do anything that will advance her own welfare to the detriment of anyone who gets in her way. But every time she makes a bad choice, she reassures herself that some day when it is more convenient, she'll be kind, worry about others before herself, sacrifice for the common good. She puts off every good choice to a tomorrow that never quite comes, never realizing that with every bad choice she makes she goes the opposite direction of where she wants to end up. That made a huge impression on me growing up. I came to realize that every single choice I made was a building block in the person I would become. Kindness and self-denial are not concepts to be discussed but character traits to be developed by practicing them time after time, when it is least convenient and hardest to do. But if I practice being gracious throughout my life, I am confident that some day I will grow to be like the women I so admire.
"A gracious woman attains honor. Let (her adornment) be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. Strength and dignity are her clothing and she smiles at the future. She opens her mouth in wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue." (medley of Proverbs 11:16, 1 Peter 3:4, Proverbs 31: 25, 26) This is what I aspire to.
Showing posts with label old age. Show all posts
Showing posts with label old age. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
Seven Things About Me
Ruth has tagged me to tell 7 things about me, and they don't even have to be unimportant! So here they are and how would a bunch of you like to play too? If you do, please let me know.
1. In high school, I took a photography class that included developing our film in a darkroom. I really liked it, and my teacher entered me in a local photography contest. I got a first place and a second place. After our marriage, my husband and I continued entering and placing in contests.
2. I have been married 30 years this December to my best friend, lover, soul-mate, confidante, the one who makes me laugh and makes me think, the smartest, most interesting human being I have ever known.
3. We homeschooled our boys from Kindergarten through High School graduation. It took 20 years and it was hard work for all of us. But it was also fun and rewarding, and they are so worth it. They turned out like their dad, so obviously it worked out well!
4. I knew I wanted to go to college from the time I started first grade, but right after high school I decided to get my MRS. degree instead. Which of course I had been determined not to do, but when you meet the love of your life your dreams sometimes change. My husband promised some day he'd send me to college, and when I was in my early forties, he did. I got my degree in 2004. And a really cool side note is that my oldest son went to the same college and we graduated together on the same day, both with honors.
5. I inherited good genes and everyone thinks I am much younger than I am. This can be amusing, but it can be a little weird - in college everyone thought my son was my husband! Freaky. My husband likes to call me his trophy wife. I kind of like that, but I won't mind when I look my age and everyone knows I am his original model!
6. Before the age of 10, I moved with my family constantly. I was in 3 schools by 3rd grade. But at the age of 10, we moved in to the neighborhood I'm in now. I lived with my parents to the age of 18, moved to another house on the same block with my new husband where we rented for 15 years, then we bought the house across the street where we've lived for the past 14 1/2 years.
7. I have long, brown, straight hair parted in the middle. I get it trimmed once in awhile so it doesn't get too shaggy at the ends, but otherwise, I just brush it and (in winter) leave it hanging, or (in summer) put it in a ponytail. If I'm feeling really fancy, I'll use a pretty barrette to pull it partially back, and if I'm feeling really hot, I'll put it in a bun. I have never colored it, and now at 47, it is beginning to get silvery, sparkly threads sprinkled throughout. I toyed with getting it colored when the first ones appeared, but my husband begged me not to and my son showed me in Proverbs 16:31 where it says "A gray head is a crown of glory; It is found in the way of righteousness." So I left them alone, and to my surprise, I like them. I realize they will proliferate and take over at some point - and I intend to let them. I hope to have a beautiful crown of soft, white hair some day, like my grandmother.
1. In high school, I took a photography class that included developing our film in a darkroom. I really liked it, and my teacher entered me in a local photography contest. I got a first place and a second place. After our marriage, my husband and I continued entering and placing in contests.
2. I have been married 30 years this December to my best friend, lover, soul-mate, confidante, the one who makes me laugh and makes me think, the smartest, most interesting human being I have ever known.
3. We homeschooled our boys from Kindergarten through High School graduation. It took 20 years and it was hard work for all of us. But it was also fun and rewarding, and they are so worth it. They turned out like their dad, so obviously it worked out well!
4. I knew I wanted to go to college from the time I started first grade, but right after high school I decided to get my MRS. degree instead. Which of course I had been determined not to do, but when you meet the love of your life your dreams sometimes change. My husband promised some day he'd send me to college, and when I was in my early forties, he did. I got my degree in 2004. And a really cool side note is that my oldest son went to the same college and we graduated together on the same day, both with honors.
5. I inherited good genes and everyone thinks I am much younger than I am. This can be amusing, but it can be a little weird - in college everyone thought my son was my husband! Freaky. My husband likes to call me his trophy wife. I kind of like that, but I won't mind when I look my age and everyone knows I am his original model!
6. Before the age of 10, I moved with my family constantly. I was in 3 schools by 3rd grade. But at the age of 10, we moved in to the neighborhood I'm in now. I lived with my parents to the age of 18, moved to another house on the same block with my new husband where we rented for 15 years, then we bought the house across the street where we've lived for the past 14 1/2 years.
7. I have long, brown, straight hair parted in the middle. I get it trimmed once in awhile so it doesn't get too shaggy at the ends, but otherwise, I just brush it and (in winter) leave it hanging, or (in summer) put it in a ponytail. If I'm feeling really fancy, I'll use a pretty barrette to pull it partially back, and if I'm feeling really hot, I'll put it in a bun. I have never colored it, and now at 47, it is beginning to get silvery, sparkly threads sprinkled throughout. I toyed with getting it colored when the first ones appeared, but my husband begged me not to and my son showed me in Proverbs 16:31 where it says "A gray head is a crown of glory; It is found in the way of righteousness." So I left them alone, and to my surprise, I like them. I realize they will proliferate and take over at some point - and I intend to let them. I hope to have a beautiful crown of soft, white hair some day, like my grandmother.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Goodbye, Ruth
My husband's Aunt Ruth died Saturday in Hope Hospice. She came to live with us a year ago when her husband of 61 years passed away. She stayed five months until her care became more than we could provide. Then she went to reign as the Belle of the Nursing Home for another 8 months. She was a funny, sweet, feisty, generous lady and we were blessed to get to know her better. She loved Nascar racing, and thought Tony Stewart was wonderful! She worked at the telephone company all her life, but to her dismay, realized she no longer understood how to use the telephone. She loved music, flowers, getting her hair done, and eating anything sweet. We had to track her down to visit her at the nursing home. She was always off doing something fun, and when we did find her she was full of stories about winning at Bingo, ("I won a quarter! Big deal!" she'd grin), going out to eat, watching musical performances, attending church services and making new friends. ("There are such nice people here!" she'd tell me). Ruth was generous all her life and even at the home she was always trying to give her things away to the other residents or use her Bingo winnings to buy candy for the staff. She loved new experiences and refused to live in the past. "I won't worry," she told me frequently. "Worry causes wrinkles!"
When Ruth was going to go in the nursing home, she told me she hoped they would offer dancing lessons. Well, now she is in her permanent home - and I'll bet she's dancing!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
