Tuesday, September 1, 2009

September is Back and So Am I


I thank you for your kindness in bearing with me, after what may have seemed like a melodramatic statement when I posted last. I wrote it in the impulsive aftermath of an emotional night. My dislike of August has nothing whatsoever to do with the weather, but with a deep sorrow. After all these years I had thought it would not be so sharp. Indeed I get through some Augusts almost unscathed. Other years I am blindsided by what amounts to a tsunami through my heart. I would have liked to say a tsunami of my soul because to my writer's ear it sounds better. But I cannot because despite my pain, God has kept my soul firmly in His grasp. But as anyone who has a hidden sorrow - and I am beginning to think that is all of us - I needed a time of solitude and renewal. Prayer and Scripture, physical activity and creative endeavors have helped me with my grief. After all, God says precious in His sight are the death of His holy ones. We who are yet clothed in weak flesh need sometimes to rediscover that death is not the end of life.

11 comments:

Connie said...

Glad to see you back. My thoughts and prayers have been with you during the difficult month of August.

P.S. As to the remark about grandchildren I almost fell off my chair it had me chuckling so!!!

steviewren said...

It sounds like you have emerged from your dark days. I'm glad to see you back.

Jill said...

Whatever it may be, I am glad you made it through yet another August despite a painful past!!
Happy September TO YOU! May it be filled with GOOD things!!
Welcome back!

Protege said...

Ah, what a heartfelt post. I am sorry that the month of August hold so much sorrow for you.:(
You are right, we all have sadness in our heart, to a lesser or greater extend.
I am happy you found solace in your beliefs.
Welcome back.
xo

Sassy Granny ... said...

I'm glad you're back! I completely understand the August thing (= heartache). I have a similar experience, though some 20 years later the pain has lessened. Even so, certain days or smells or sounds summon it. It's good, then, to rest in the Lord.

Beauty from ashes. His promise. You must be growing more radiant by the day!

Hugs,
Kathleen

Susan said...

I'm so glad you're back! Missed you and am praying for peace for you ...

Islandsparrow said...

I hope your month away has been one of rest and renewal. Praying that you continue to find deep comfort in His love and truth.

Sara said...

It is so good to have you back among us again. Oh, those heart tsunami's! Always run to Him when the devastation hits hard...you did the wisest thing possible.

It seems to me that God allows these hidden griefs to sweep over us now and then whenever we are ready to accept from Him some new insight and deeper healing as life circles back around again...I like to believe it is an upward spiral because, as you say, He does hold our soul firmly in His grasp at all times.

Cherdecor said...

Welcome to September and back to blogland. I hope that the days get better for you. I pray that your heart heals.

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

How glad I am to read that God has brought you through the darkness and sorrow.

louise said...

I hope the following gives you comfort in some way.

I Have A Place in Heaven - Unknown

Please don't sing sad songs for me
Forget your grief and fears
For I am in a perfect place
Away from pain and tears.

It's far away from hunger
And hurt and want and pride
I have a place in Heaven
With the Master at my side.

My life on earth was very good
As earthly life can go
But Paradise is so much more
Than anyone can know.

My heart is filled with happiness
And sweet rejoicing too
To walk with God is perfect peace
A joy forever new.

Louise x

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